Post-Op (by Pneuman)

I had an operation last night to repair my broken horn. What my human neglected to tell me was that SHE planned on performing the surgery HERSELF instead of hiring a legitimate Dragon surgeon. Her excuse was that it is next to impossible to find a reliable Dragon surgeon these days. She went on to say that she had sat through about half a dozen first aid training classes and thought she "could pretty much handle it."

Pretty much? PRETTY MUCH!?!?!

If SHE were having major reconstructive surgery, would SHE like it if her surgeon said, "Oh, I can pretty much handle it"?? Of course not. My human is intelligent enough, but she lacks basic common sense. Sigh. Writers.

Anyway, I protested. I wanted her to find someone to perform my surgery who had at least attended medical school for five blasted minutes. She countered this, saying that even if she could find a doctor, chances are, the doctor would know nothing about Dragons. And even if she managed to find a doctor who was comfortable and skilled enough to operate on a Dragon, it was almost certain that her insurance didn't cover Dragon Muses. I saw her point.

She also reasoned that if she could not find a Dragon doctor to perform my operation, she should find a Dragon expert. She then named herself a Dragon expert. When I challenged this claim, she said that people could become experts on any given subject if they had written a book on that given subject. As she has written three books about Dragons, she could be considered a Dragon expert.

Sigh...WRITERS!!!

At this point I was tired of arguing with her, and I just wanted my horn fixed. I set aside my reservations and allowed her to perform the surgery. It took less than ten minutes for the actual procedure, though the recovery time was overnight. The results are surprising. My human did a decent job. You can barely tell my horn was ever disconnected from my head.

My human told me I should be Musing again by Monday. I hope that's the case, because that's when she plans on resuming her writing career (she's been on a break for the past month). She's going to need her Muse.

...sigh...writers.

The Accident (by Pneuman)

My human is slightly obsessed with a fictional donkey named Eeyore. I'm not sure what her bizarre fascination with a depressed donkey, but she loves him. One of her favorite quotes is by Eeyore. "Accidents. You never have them until you're having them."

Recently, my human insisted on taking me with her when she went to visit her family. She traveled by air. Rather than letting me fly by myself (I'M A DRAGON) or letting me stay home (which is what I would have preferred), she packed me in bubble wrap (oh the humility!) and stuffed me inside her carry on. I was reluctant, but she told me it would be fine. I told her I thought I would get broken, but she said it would be fine.

There was an accident. I didn't have the accident until I had it.

It could have been worse. One of my beautiful golden and blue horns snapped off my beautiful golden and blue head. I'm not in very much pain, but I am incomplete. I am humiliated. I have adamantly refused to do any musing until my human arranges for my horn to be fixed. She has agreed to arrange for an operation, which she believes will be quite simple and successful. She believes that when the operation is completed, no one will be able to tell my horn was ever broken. I have my reservations. She says it involves some kind of unusual compound known as "super glue."



I am hesitant.



The operation will be performed shortly. I hope to be restored to my former self. One thing is certain: I will not be stuffed in anymore carry ons unless my human arranges for me to have a custom-made traveling case.

No more accidents for this Dragon.