Jerry's Hatchday!!!!! (by Jerry!!!!!)

Okay, okay, so my hatchday (like a birthday, only for Dragons) was on Friday. You know. April Fool's Day. No joke. I mean, when else would a silly Dragon like myself have a hatchday? Being a Dragon, I've never really celebrated my hatchday. Dragon parents aren't big on birthday/hatchday parties like human parents seem to be. I've noticed that human parents like to give their kids gifts, invite people over, eat lots of sugar, play ridiculous games, and wear silly hats. Dragons don't do that. I think part of the reason greatly has to do with the fact that Dragons are generally kicked out of the cave before their first hatchday and left to fend for themselves.

So I spent my first hatchday, and all subsequent hatchdays, all by myself. In the cold. In the rain. With no hugs. Then I found "Mom" and my brothers and sisters, and all that changed. I think I can safely say that this is the best hatchday I've ever had in over 3000 years. I'm not sure exactly how old I am. I lost count somewhere around 3200. Let's just say I'm nine.

Okay, okay, so "Mom" had to work on my hatchday (figures), but only a half day. Still, we didn't do much. All I really wanted for my hatchday was hugs. And I got them. I got awesome hugs from "Mom" and from my brothers (even Bion!) and my sister. It was like the huggiest day ever.

Then "Mom" had a surprise for me on Saturday. She took me to work with her to see the short people. There weren't many of them, but I did get to hang out with this one little short person. "Mom" won't let me say her name on here, so we'll just call her Sunny.

Sunny was five. Sunny picked me up and put me in a shopping cart. Sunny ran around the room pushing me. It was fantastic. Sunny asked "Mom" what Dragons liked to eat. Of course, if Sunny could hear me (only "Mom" hears us because we're her Muses. You're just jealous because the Dragons aren't talking to YOU), she would have heard me say, "Dragons eat children! Dragons eat children! NOMNOMNOM!"

But "Mom" just smiled and said, "Dragons eat wishes and dreams and laughter."

What crap.

Well, Sunny just looked at "Mom" for a second and then said, "How 'bout I just give him a hot dog." And she fed me a plastic hot dog, which was actually quite good, if perhaps a little on the chewy side.

"Mom's" friend and co-worker, the WONDERFUL MISS SARA, also brought "Mom" a book as a belated Christmas/Birthday present. Only since it was my hatchday, I kind of consider the book partially mine. And it's the best book ever. It's called Magic Castle.

At the magic castle, a princess (who looks uncannily like "Mom") plays hide and seek with a Dragon (who looks uncannily like Pneuman). Then she teaches the Dragon to fly (which seems weird to me, but I'll let it pass). Then they all go drink tea in the garden.

It's a great book about a great magic castle. The EXCITEMENT NEVER ENDS. The book says so.

Also, the book has a cat.

Well, after work, Mom brought me home and we watched "How to Train Your Dragon," which is pretty much the coolest movie ever. It's about Dragons. Win. It's about Vikings. Win. The grown-up Vikings, for some strange reason, all speak with a Scottish accent. Win.

Now, the adolescent Vikings don't talk with Scottish accents. I wonder why this is. When human males hit puberty, I've heard their voices change. Maybe with Vikings, they get a whole new accent. And it's apparently Scottish.

Yeah, but I was so tired from my hatchday festivities that "Mom" had to wake me up during the movie. I'd fallen asleep on her roommate's knitting.

Don't tell her I drooled on it.